Make It Beautiful

No matter what happens, make it beautiful. This is one of my internal mantras. When things are not going my way and I feel my ego bucking against my circumstances, I remind myself to make it beautiful. This little saying is, of course, similar to the "when life gives you lemons, make lemonade" expression. It helps me to shift my thinking so that I can remain focused and productive despite less-than-ideal situations.

With this mentality, it is easier for me to have a good day. I create my own weather, in other words. I do not approach my day expecting it to meet my needs and expectations. Rather, I approach my day with the confidence that I can "arrange the pieces life gives me" as Virginia Woolf said.

This is not mere happy talk. I applied this even when I was laid off. Yes, I was laid off amidst the worst recession of my lifetime. The clinic at which I worked shut down just recently. Strangely, a year ago (when I started) I was told the company was recession-proof. The recruiter used that exact expression, recession-proof. After being laid off, I made a conscious decision to make it beautiful. I was not hurt or sad. I operated under the assumption I could not only find a new job but I could find one I love. During my time off, I arose between 7 and 8 am each morning. I maintained a daily schedule. Here are some of the things I did during that time off:

• Immediately cancelled my cable so that I could save money and distance myself from the woe-is-our-economy newsfests


• Learned new songs on my piano and clarinet


• Practiced my ukulele to my heart's content


• Started a recycling system at home


• Started this blog
• Experimented with some new cooking recipes


• Discovered how resourceful my local libraries are


• Trimmed several unnecessary expenses from my budget
  

When I was unemployed, I had plenty of good reasons to freak out. I am alone in a new town where I know hardly anyone. I had been here (from California) for only 10 months at the point of my lay off. I did not see the value in freaking out, however. I chose to set a positive intention to find a great job. Guess what happened? After being unemployed for only a month, I received a job offer at an awesome company that better fits my personality and skill set than my previous company.

The moral of the story? When your circumstance is less than ideal, choose to make it beautiful.

Copyright (c) 2009 by Quandra T. McGrue

Paradigm Shifts

The video above is a beautiful reminder of the necessity for positive paradigms. Remember The 7 Habits of Highly Effective People by Stephen R. Covey? I read this book about 10 years ago, but I was recently reminded of it at a training session I attended for my job. Covey describes a paradigm as the way we see a situation. Unfortunately, we do not often see situations as they are but we see them as we are. If we are in a negative state, then we are likely to allow that attitude to color the situations we are perceiving. It is important, therefore, to re-examine and question our paradigms.



Covey, in a presentation I saw once, spoke about an interesting example of a time when a paradigm shift completely changed the way he felt about a situation. He was in a restaurant where some kids were being unruly and loud. The kids were causing the environment of the restaurant to be uncomfortable for many of the patrons. Oddly, the father of the children sat seemingly unaware of his children's wild behavior. Covey approached the father and said, "You know, your kids are really making the restaurant uncomfortable. Maybe, you should do something." The father replied with a soft tone, "You're right. I probably should do something. We just came from the hospital where they lost their mother about an hour ago though. I guess they don't know how to handle it. I guess I don't either." This information allowed Covey to see the situation as it really was. He could view the father and the children with compassion. All of Covey's agitation dissolved.

I like the idea of keeping an open mind (of course, easier said than done). When someone or something agitates me, I can safely assume (in most cases) that I do not have all the necessary information to make a fair judgement. Perhaps, there is a perfectly reasonable explanation. I can seek out that explanation or just decide not to judge the situation (depending on the factors involved). How I view a situation (my paradigm) affects my thoughts, which affect my feelings, which determine my actions. You know that saying about your thoughts and actions, right?



Sew a thought, reap an action.

Sew an action, reap a habit.

Sew a habit, reap a character.

Sew a character, reap a destiny.



It is my paradigm, though, that determines my thoughts. If I see myself as a failure, then I will think thoughts of failure and probably fail. If I see myself as a champion, then I will think champion thoughts. My champion thoughts will inspire good feelings, constructive actions, healthier habits, stronger character, and a destiny worth living.



The great individuals in the video above possessed positive paradigms that helped them to persevere through their challenges. Despite their setbacks, they achieved extraordinary things. We can too!





Copyright (c) 2009 by Quandra T. McGrue